Dr Jackson is still ‘seconded’ to McMurdo Sound and the role of Problem Page ‘Uncle’ for this month has been taken over by Cmdr Straker.
Dear Dr. Jackson,
My girlfriend and I are planning to go away together on holiday for a month, in April next year. I really fancy a trek through the Amazon jungle , whereas she wants to idle the time away on a beach in Spain.
I hate getting sunburned and she hates spiders so we are going to come to blows about this and I would appreciate your advice.
We have not booked anything yet, but time is getting on and we need to come to a decision about the holiday in the next couple of weeks. How can we come to an agreement that pleases us both?
Yours, Amazonian Adventurer
Dear Amazonian Adventurer.
I see from your records that you and your ‘girlfriend’ work in the same SHADO department.
I have the perfect solution to your problem.
As you are aware, all furlough requests have to be approved by a senior officer.
Your application has been rejected. You may take two weeks holiday in May. Your current girlfriend has been allocated her annual leave in April.
Dear Dr Jackson.
I have been invited to a party to celebrate a friend’s birthday on the last day of this month. The dress code is ‘ informal’ and I am already wondering what to wear.
I dread turning up there in jeans and a t-shirt only to discover that everyone else is in smart suits.
Or even worse I turn up in my chinos and hand-made shirt to find everyone else in Bermuda shorts and garish Hawaiian shirts.
Please can you advise me?
Dear Perplexed Party-goer.
I have rescheduled the rota so that you will be on Moonbase at the end of the month. That will neatly solve your predicament.
However. You can afford hand-made shirts?
Please expect a visit from Dr Jackson on his return from McMurdo Sound. He will discuss your current salary and arrange for a full interrogation as soon as possible.
(This job is so easy! I don’t know why Jackson says it is difficult doing the Problem Page. I might just leave him where he is for another month.)
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OMG, I am laughing so hard right now. (Not at you, Commander Straker, sir.)
Farand? SHADO Operative 1832? Assigned to Moonbase Operations? I have requested your file. I sincerely hope, for your sake, that you are NOT laughing at me. Dr Jackson needs an assistant and you could find yourself assigned to work with him for the foreseeable future. (How good are you at washing test tubes?) Cmdr E. Straker