In anticipation of our eventual conquest of the new world, we have devised a list of handy hints that will enable our brave colonists to use all available resources to ensure their survival.
These have all been rigorously tested and approved by our scientists.
A:
Aluminium foil: Toast your own sandwich. Cheese sandwiches wrapped in aluminium foil can be turned into an instant hot and tasty snack by using an iron to press both sides of the wrapped sandwich. Useful for when you are away from the home comforts of a well-equipped UFO.
B:
Baby wipes: Use a baby wipe to clean the computer keyboards in your UFO. And keep a pack in your UFO to clean your hands after changing a tyre, or removing organs.
C:
Cat Litter: If your space suit (or trainers) reek, fill a couple of old cotton socks with cat litter, tie them up, and put them in your spacesuit over night.
D:
Disposable nappies: make sure those fragile items (such as fresh hearts etc.) travel without damage. Put a couple of disposable nappies at the bottom of your shopping bags. Voila! No more bruised goods
E:
Eggs: Plant your precious homeworld seeds in eggshells. Fill them with soil and press the seeds inside. Once they are ready to be transplanted, remove them from the shells.
F:
Flour: Make your stainless steel console in your UFO shine once more. Sprinkle flour on it and rub with a soft dry cloth. Then wipe down with a damp cloth to restore it to its former glory.
G:
Gaffer Tape: You will never get locked out of your UFO again if you fix an extra key to the undercarriage with gaffer tape.
H:
Hairspray:
Protect your recipe cards with a light spray of hairspray so that any spatters can be easily wiped off when you are following our tasty recipes, such as …. meatballs!
I:
Ice-cream scoops: To make meatballs ( recipe to follow later this month, but save all those unused human lungs and livers in the freezer!!) that are the same size every time., use an ice-cream scoop to measure out equal amounts.
J:
Jars: Help your spacesuit gloves dry out by pulling them over the bottom of an empty jar. Then stand the jar upside down over a warm air vent. The warmth will fill the jar and dry out your gloves.
K:
Ketchup: Clean the copper in your UFO by coating it with a thin layer of ketchup and leaving it for a few minutes. Rinse and dry.
L:
Lemons: It’s bad enough that you have green skin, but unsightly scaly elbows? Eugh. Mix baking soda and lemon juice into a paste and rub it into your elbows for a soothing exfoliating treatment. Sorry, it doesn’t remove green stains.
More Homeworld Handy Tips later this month!